So, apparently we’re in 2015 now. I’m not too sure about this, but the eleventy billion pictures and posts and such splashed across social media gave me a hint. It’s lovely to see such excitement for a new year. New hopes. New dreams. New ideas. Feeling optimistic for how things will pan out. I’ll take two thanks.
It’s also that time of the year where people vow to make resolutions. To ‘fix’ stuff or to ‘improve’ themselves/their life/other or to ‘do’ more. It’s good to have something to work towards, no doubt about it. But resolutions can kiss my ass. Wanna know why?
Because they often set us up for expectations we may not meet. We place too much pressure on ourselves to attain these resolutions. And sometimes we set resolutions that may not be entirely realistic. Like my resolution of “I will ALWAYS remember to text people back in a reasonable timeframe”. Thinking error, anyone? Ummm…. Soz. Not gonna happen. Thankfully my friends understand what a muddle-headed slack ass I am. I’m thinking about them, just getting sidetracked and texting later. Oops.
We feel compelled to set ourselves something, but then the busyness of life comes along and sweeps us off our feet and before we know it, it’s June and we’ve done jack shit about our resolution. So then we feel like a mild failure, but forget about it and throw the resolution away like the Moro bars from a Favourites box (yes. Yes I have an issue. Must.let.Moro.saga.go…..). Then the end of the year comes, we reflect on our failed resolutions and vow to make a new, more whiz-bang one that we will totes conquer the following year. Rinse and repeat.
So instead of a resolution, maybe we should just look at a couple of things we’d like to try out for the next year. I’m not even using the word goals at the moment, as even that can send us into a tailspin. For the things you’d like to try this year:
- Make them SMART- Specific, Measureable, Achievable, Realistic and ensure they have a clear Timeline. Don’t get all vague, you’ll get nowhere. I.e. instead of “I’d like to learn Japanese” try “I’m going to try to learn Japanese, and first thing is I’ll choose a course by March”.
- Set short term plans and long term plans for your things. What is it that you’d like to see in a week? 3 weeks? 3 months? By the end of the year? Setting those little markers up will help you keep your eye on the prize
- Tell someone your thing. Have a support team to keep you on track. Better yet, do a ‘thing’ with someone. Takes a village, peeps.
- Instead of getting rid of stuff, or changing/fixing things, try to look at the flipside. Adding something. Challenging yourself. Trying something new. I think when we set ourselves a negative resolution like “I will stop smoking” it can hit us hard when we don’t entirely meet it. So flip it and try instead to “I will try to start a smoke-free year”. Sounds silly as it means the same thing, but the framing can make all the difference.
- No absolutes. Ban “I will” “I must” “I need to”. Again, too much pressure. Just go for “I will try”. Because even if you don’t 100% attain your thing, you tried. And mentally that will help you to persist instead of throw in the towel because you ‘failed’ your resolution.
The lovely Bron from Maxabella Loves has devised a beautiful idea to go with a theme word for the year. Just one word that you will try to incorporate into your life. This is really neat as it doesn’t put any pressure on you to have a resolution, more it’s a bit of a mantra that you keep in your mind as you go through your day. You can apply it to specific things, or you can just use it as a general idea. And Ellen over at Potential Psychology has some awesome resolution tips too.
On the flipside, this article looks at resolutions you’re not allowed to make in 2015. Amen. Hilar.
So there you have it. Don’t feel bad about resolutions anymore. Try a few things, and see what they bring.
Have you made any resolutions? Or non-resolutions? Come share them with me. I’ll give you a Moro bar for your efforts. x